Weekly Roundup #3

This post does NOT contain affiliate links. Just regular links to the products I’m using.

 

This week will be a little short on the list of things I’m enjoying. It’s mostly been clay. Yes, clay.

I’ve worked with clay many times before, but I’ve been doing something a little different. It actually started back up again in December, when I made my own ornaments using Crayola Air Dry Clay  and some gingerbread men and candy cane shaped cookie cutters. Last month I started making fairy doors, which proved fun enough, but then I moved back to cookie cutters.

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(two out of three doors)

 

This time I’ve been using the previously mentioned clay, and two home made recipes. The first was a basic salt dough recipe, lightly scented with cinnamon. The single batch was enough to make 20 ornaments at most if I rolled it out thin.

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(some are salt dough, the others are air dry clay)

 

The second recipe I found online. You cook it up on the stove for a couple minutes, let it cool, and it dries like porcelain clay. With one batch of that, I can make 40 large ornaments tops. I’m actually thinking of turning some of these into Halloween/Christmas ornaments, and some into needle minders.

 

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(stage one of painting the cauldrons)

 

I’ll be able to show you some of the other things I’m making with the dough soon enough. See you Sunday!

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Body image and self hate

First of all, sorry this post is so much later in the day than usual. I almost forgot about the whole thing. I think it’s just been an off week. Anyways, on to your regularly scheduled post!

 

This week I’m going to talk about body image. My body image. Also the self hate that develops when you don’t love your body as it is.

 

I know my body has been different from most people in my age group since I was a kid. I’ve had a wider rib cage than my friends and class mates. I also started growing breasts in the third grade. By fifth grade, I already wore a D cup. Those two things, I think, where what started my body image issues. I was made fun of. People said I stuffed my bra. Other people just thought I was a much older student hanging around younger kids. I think I went on my first diet (imposed by my mother) in sixth grade.

 

In seventh grade, I put myself on a dangerous diet of my own. I would only eat one meal a day, spend half that day at school (including PE) and then spend a few more hours at tech week for a community play I was in. I lost ten pounds that week. I know, I know. It was dangerous and stupid but I was so sick of the mean things my classmates would say because I wasn’t rail thin. The sad thing was that the only thing anyone said was that the play was good for me, because I lost weight. It was then that it got kind of stuck in my mind that normal diets don’t work. I have to starve and over work myself to lose weight.

The next year my mom put me on the Atkins diet for a month. I was miserable the whole time and only lost three pounds, reaffirming my idea that normal, safe diets don’t work for me.

In high school, some of my classmates made fun of my big arms when I wore cap sleeves. So any time I wanted to wear a shirt with short or cap sleeves, I had a jacket on over it. Even in the summer.

I struggled with my weight all through high school and college. Hell, I still struggle with it to this day. Normal diets don’t work, the unsafe diets don’t work for long, and no matter what I do, I can’t get down to a ‘healthy’ weight.

I’ve been told my whole life to cover up. After about fifth grade, I wasn’t allowed to wear shorts outside of the house. I wasn’t allowed to wear tank tops or scoop necks. I had to cover my body from my collar bones to my knees, and if I didn’t my parents and sister would call me disgusting and demand I put something else on.

 

I’ve hated the way I look for years. I’ve hated seeing myself in the mirror. I’ve made myself wear only baggy, loose clothing. They’re comfortable, don’t get me wrong, but I can’t find more shaped things I really like in my size. I’d love to wear shorts in public in the summer. I’d love to wear tank tops and fitted shirts but I can never forget all the comments I would hear growing up. I can never forget all the comments I still hear my parents saying when they see someone big walking around in ‘revealing’ clothing.

 

All that said, if you’re even half comfortable wearing something just do it. Wear the comfortable thing. Wear the cute thing. Tell the haters to go fuck themselves, because it’s your body. Not theirs.

A little goes a long way

Okay, I admit I haven’t done much stitching this week. It’s been one of those ‘do as little as possible now to avoid burnout later’ kind of weeks.

That said, I’ve done most of page one on Flitwick. It’s working up pretty fast so far. I’m a little surprised his hair took a little less than 3 yards of the specialty thread. The thread looks awesome, by the way. It’s not as fuzzy stitched up as it is on it’s own, but it makes the hair and beard look kinda soft and fluffy. Anyways, here’s the picture:

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I worked on Witch Board a little, too. There’s sooooooooooooooooooooooooooo much border left, it’s insane. I think I might switch it up a little. A thread or two of the border color, and then a thread or two of one of the other colors (like for the sun in one corner, the moon and stars in another, and the bat in the center). Here’s that photo:

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For today’s Etsy pattern I’m going to post the Ice Queen dress. I feel like I could improve it a little, but honestly I feel that way about most of my patterns so it’s probably ready to go up.

 

In other news, Crookshanks turned two yesterday. He celebrated by waking me up early, and getting into trouble. Spooky’s birthday is on the 14th (she will also be turning two).

 

That’s all for now. Until next time, Happy Stitching!

Weekly Roundup #2

This post contains affiliate links. If you click on one, I get five cents.

 

First and foremost I am loving a new (to me) book.  Monster High novel #2, The Ghoul Next Door by Lisi Harrison. You’ll need to read the first book before picking up this one, if you haven’t already, but I’m just a few chapters in, and it’s full of tension, laughs, and intrigue. (no link for this one, but you can get it on amazon)

 

Second, I’ve been checking out The LittleStitcherShop on etsy, and have found some great patterns that I hope to eventually get to. Here’s The Addams Family (my favorite of all of them)

Santa Claus is Coming to Town

 

The Headless Woman

And The Banshee’s Cry

 

What are your favorite Little Stitcher patterns?

People who cause depression

I won’t go into full details here, but let’s talk about people who cause or exacerbate depression.

 

I said before that my home life isn’t good, and that I wanted to get away from it. It’s because I have a mentally abusive family. Sure, sometimes they’re nice. Sometimes they’re even pleasant. Mostly they like to throw nasty comments my way, picking at everything I enjoy or do. It’s been that way since I was a kid.

 

In fact, as a child, I heard on a daily bases that I was ugly, stupid, fat, useless, and unlovable. Imagine being 15 and hearing that daily. Anyone who says ‘just ignore it’ or ‘it can’t bother you if you don’t let it’ would be the person I would say this to: I want you to sit back, close your eyes, and imagine you’re a teenager. You’re young, you’re impressionable, and you hear on a daily basis that you’re ugly. You’re stupid and fat and useless. That no one will ever love you. You hear that every single day for years. From your parents. It’s not so easy to ignore, is it? In fact, it’s been proven that if you hear the same thing every day for that long, you start to believe it. It becomes one of those repeated facts that stay in your mind. That’s how they stripped away my self confidence, and my self worth.

My older sister is a terror. She’s never forgiven me for being born. She’s 6 years older than me, and even though she’s in her 30’s, she still acts like a toddler. As an adult, she’s thrown fits in stores if I dared to pick up an item that said ‘princess’ on it. Our mother would then get mad at me for picking up that item, because if my sister is around, I’m not allowed to have anything that might suggest I’m a princess. More than that, since she’s living with us again (that is to say me and my parents, in my parents home) she’ll throw fits, cuss, and scream, and threaten when she doesn’t get her way. She’ll complain that the house isn’t spotless, and then make a mess herself and refuse to clean it. Hell, her kids or her dog will make a mess and then blame me to anyone who will listen, even if they’re all telling her it wasn’t me who did it, and they saw her kids or her dog make said mess. Her constant screaming has my nerves on edge. She has me constantly wondering what she’s going to flip out about this time; what she’s going to blame me for next.

 

All the while, everyone is making little jabs at my hobbies and interests. They treat me like a child for having interests, for being enthusiastic about them, and for what those interests are. “Oh, The Walking Dead is on *insert eye roll here* we aren’t going to get anything out of her right now”. *insert mocking tone and action about me being excited about a new move here*. “Hur hur hur you like dragons and fairies. You’re such a little kid” (yeah, I’m nearly 30. Not exactly a child). So I try not to share my interests with any of them. I can’t talk about things without being mocked. I have no one to talk to in person about anything I like.

 

I’m not saying any of this to garner sympathy or anything like that. I’m telling you these things to show you that if you’ve ever gone through anything similar, you’re not alone. It’s happened to me too. And I’m living proof that you can fight it. You can fight it as long as you have to. I’m still here. I’m still living this every day and I’m fighting it. I’m fighting to create a better tomorrow for myself. Do I still get depressed whenever I hear their crap? Hell yes. Does it nag at me in the back of my mind that they’re saying these things, and they may be right? Yes it does. But I’m fighting it. And so can you.

A slight departure in theme

I’ve had a slight departure in stitching theme recently. It’s kinda ‘love’ themed. And it has flowers. And hearts. Although if you know me, you can see why I wanted to do this one. I created a pattern involving the second verse of Annabel Lee from Edgar Allan Poe. It’s only 3.5 x 4 inches, so it’s tiny and really fast to do:

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(more on this one next month, hopefully)

I took a bit of a break from stitching, going slow on the previous project, and having a good time playing Rise of the Tomb Raider for a while. But then I started yet another new project.

This is one you’ve already seen a preview for. Professor Flitwick decorating a Christmas tree. I’m really not that far into it, but it already looks good:

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Spooky declined having her picture taken this week, but Crookshanks decided to pose for his. Both cats found the joy of sticking their faces into empty containers until they can lift said container without their paws or mouth:

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Today is also Walking Dead day. Including today, there’s only three episodes left this season. What am I going to do with my Sunday nights after that? lol. At least things are cooking up on the show, so tonight’s episode should be interesting, to say the least.

I’ve decided that today’s new Etsy pattern is going to be that pink castle I showed you before. I have no idea what I’m going to add on Tuesday, but I have around 35 patterns I’ve already made to choose from, so whatever it is, it shall be interesting.

 

That’s all for now. Until next time, Happy Stitching!

Weekly Roundup #1

This post contains affiliate links. If you click on one, I get five cents.

 

So begins a (hopefully) weekly round up of things I love. 

 

First and foremost was last night’s episode of Supernatural! The Scooby Doo cross over had me in stitches from laughing so hard. The drawing was spot on. The voices perfect. Everything was just so. . . wonderful!

 

Next is cross stitch designer Maria Brovko. Her Hogwarts In A Bottle pattern is adorable!

I can’t wait until I can clear out enough of my to-stitch list to get this one!

 

Third is a pattern called ‘Clue Board Game‘ by PlatoSquirrel

I’ve loved playing Clue since I was about 8 years old, and this is an adorable nod to that.

 

Fourth, and last, is the affiliate company I’ve started with. (They are NOT paying me to say this in any way) shopstylecollective lets you pin items from many online stores, and has a collection on their own website from all over the web that includes clothing and accessories. You can even build widgets to put on your blog or website, and any time someone clicks a link, you get a few cents. If someone purchases from that link, you get a bit more. It’s a great way to share things you like and earn a tiny amount. More importantly, it’s free advertising for the maker/seller.

 

That’s it for this week. Until next time, SEE YA!